It has been some time since I wanted to blog this. Considered very long before I decided to pen down how I feel. Afterall this is my blog, it is suppose to be the place I write about how I feel. Judge me all you want by what I wrote, but I mean no harm except this is me.

Maybe I have been used to seeing my friends changing. It is normal yet hard to adapt to. Everybody does change, after a long time being separated, there is less topic, less interaction and soon no longer understanding. I think I am getting used to the fact that my friends do change. First saw two of my best childhood friends changed in sec 2, then my secondary friend that goes to school together change in sec4 and recently another. Actually I felt that my dear friend has changed a little since december. Then, I told myself not to be too upset. As long she is happy, I am happy. Looking at how happy wei xien is now, I am contended. Hopefully Veronica and Angela is happy too. Though they are no longer they friends I knew, I hope for the best for them. Recently, I have the same thoughts. She changed and so be it. The yearn for things that are clearly not in my league have separated us into people of two worlds. Maybe from the start we were from two worlds but able to be friends because of fate. Now she's just returning to where she belongs. Disappointed I was, but that is only how I feel. Maybe it is just a little selfish me inside that hope she is still the same old girl I think knew. But everybody changes. I definitely changed too. But I don't know how my friends had reacted to it. I realized everybody changes as they grow up. Maybe it is a transition phase of our lives.

I wonder to what extend is- the difficulty of not bringing up certain matter just because we do not know how to put it across, true? I know there are some things better to be unsaid, but it is also the very things that may affect a relationship.

I realized if I wanted to hide something I will try not to say, however, my mouth does allow me to hold back. Whether I like to or not, I will still say it out. Unless my little pea brain forgets about it shortly(which is quite often coz usually I cannot remember who and what I said). But yar, that's me. Have I changed? yes. I became more immune to such sight as I grow older.

However, I really hope at the end of the day, I can still remain as friends with everyone I know. At least, one day along the street, I can go up to you and say hi or even hug you.

That's my little thoughts.. 8 hrs and I'll be leaving to go back to Malacca. And more contemplating along the way..